12:21 by FoxTwo Just hours after the Apple iPad launched, it seemed that the Internet is abuzz and excited about the new product.
I just thought I'd put together a quickie guide what it is and what you can expect with the Apple iPad.
1. Retail packaging
This is what the box looks like
2. The iPad
3. Video Tutorial
Watch the video below on what the product is and how to use it.
This post is not meant to be taken seriously!!
21:55 by FoxTwo
Eat, Drink, And Have Wild Sex!
.. oh yeah and learn French too!
23:58 by FoxTwo
Cops Trying To Catch Speeding Motorists - BEWARE!
Well the good thing is that I don't own a car, so I will hardly ever get caught for speeding. Well, only when I rent a car, anyway.
But, for policemen, part of their duties could very well be catching errant speeding motorists on our roads, in a bid to make roads "safer" for all of us. I truly salute them for the work they do.
However, if you're a traffic police officer, take heed of the warning presented below:
If you get killed on duty by a missile, I wonder if your insurance will pay up?
22:11 by FoxTwo
Windows Vista Source Code - Unveiled!
Image via WikipediaA quick one today. I came across this on my usual random surfing among blogs and websites and randomly clicking on interesting links.Imagine my surprise when I found this!
Windows Vista is really a simple piece of software! Even a layman (ie non-programmer) should be able to understand the source code listed below. In fact you'd be amazed by how simple it is, and would smack yourself silly for not thinking of this earlier. You could be the one making millions of dollars instead of good old Bill Gates!
Click on the image below to enlarge, so you can read the code:
So, what'd I tell you? :)
Labels: humor, Humour, windows
08:50 by FoxTwo
Cute Life Partner Wanted. Apply Within
Wanted, cute female partner. Apply by leaving comments
Must Haves:
- Nice furry coat
- Good teeth
- Energetic
Must Not Haves:
- Lousy sense of smell
- Fussy about food
Don't Mind If Have:
- Kids from a previous partner, as long as they aren't with her now
Don't Mind if Don't Have:
- Money
- Car
- Credit Card
- Own cage
- Personalised peeing spot
Uh yeah, this want-ad is for my hamster.... what'd you think it was?!
14:32 by FoxTwo
Scientific Proof On Santa Claus
After years of research and constant pestering by parents around the world, research into the existence of Santa Claus finally bore fruit! Below are the findings of the research team:
- No known species of reindeer can fly. But there ARE 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not completely rule out flying reindeer, which only Santa has seen.
- There are 2 billion children (under 18) in the world. But since Santa doesn`t appear to handle Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist and Jewish children, that reduces the workload to 15% of the total- 378 million or so. At an average rate of 3.5 children per household, that's 91.8 million homes. One presumes there's at least one good child in each.
- Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west. This works out to 822.6 visits per second.
- This is to say that for each Christian household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining gifts under the tree, eat the snacks, get back up the chimney, get back in the sleigh, and move on to the next house.
- Assuming that each of these 91.8 million homes are distributed evenly (which we know to be false but for the sake of these calculations we will accept) we are now talking about .78 miles per household, a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops.
- This means that Santa`s sleigh is traveling at 650 miles per second, 3000 times the speed of sound. For comparison, the fastest man made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe moves at a poky 27.4 MPS; the average reindeer runs at 15 MPH.
- The sleigh's payload adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized Lego set (2 pounds), the sleigh is carrying 321,300 tons, not counting Santa, who is invariably described as overweight.
- On land, conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that "flying reindeer" (see point one) could pull TEN TIMES the usual amount, we can not do the job with 8 or even 9. We need 214,000 reindeer. This increases the weight, not even counting the sleigh, to 353,430 tons. Again, for comparison this is 4 times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth 2 (the luxury liner, not the Queen!).
- A mass of 353,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance. This will heat the reindeer in the same manner as a spacecraft reentering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer will absorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of energy. Per second. Each.
- In short, they will burst into flame almost instantaneously, exposing the next pair of reindeer, and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire team will be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second.
- Santa, meanwhile, will be subjected to centrifugal forces 17,500.06 times the force of gravity. A 300 pound Santa would be pinned to the back of his sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force.
- Conclusion: There was a Santa, but he's dead now. Merry Christmas!
Ok now, let's let the Santa Claus issue rest eh?
13:21 by FoxTwo Oh yes I am.... and I'm adorable too. Don't believe me? Check this out below:
Lets101 Quizzes - blog quizzes
See? Even the stars agree.... :p
Labels: astrology, funny, humor, Humour
21:50 by FoxTwo
Girls! If You're Looking For A Rich Husband....
Recently in New York City (in the USA in case you don't know where that is), an apparently (self-proclaimed) stunningly beautiful girl posted this in a Personal Ad:
What am I doing wrong?
Okay, I’m tired of beating around the bush. I’m a beautiful (spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I’m articulate and classy. I’m not from New York . I’m looking to get married to a guy who makes at least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind that a million a year is middle class in New York City , so I don’t think I’m overreaching at all.
Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around 200 - 250. But that’s where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won’t get me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she’s not as pretty as I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I get to her level?
Here are my questions specifically:
- Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars, restaurants, gyms
- What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won’t hurt my feelings
- Is there an age range I should be targeting (I’m 25)?
- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east side so plain? I’ve seen really ‘plain jane’ boring types who have nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I’ve seen drop dead gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What’s the story there?
- Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?
- How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for MARRIAGE ONLY
Please hold your insults - I’m putting myself out there in an honest way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I’m being up front about it. I wouldn’t be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn’t able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a nice home and hearth.
* it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 432279810
Well, I admire her for her honesty. That's what she wants in a husband. Everybody has their own criteria, and she, hers. I can respect her for not "settling for less", although her Personal Ad smacks of "gold digging".
Before long, she got a reply to her ad:
Dear Pers-431649184:
I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament. Firstly, I’m not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here’s how I see it.
Your offer, is plain and simple a cr@ppy business deal. Here’s why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you
suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring my money. Fine, simple. But here’s the rub, your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity…in fact, it is very likely that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won’t be getting any more beautiful!
So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation accelerates! Let me explain, you’re 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!
So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy and hold…hence the rub…marriage. It doesn’t make good business sense to “buy you” (which is what you’re asking) so I’d rather lease. In case you think I’m being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It’s as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.
Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So, I wonder why a girl as “articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful” as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K hasn’t found you, if not only for a tryout.
By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then we wouldn’t need to have this difficult conversation.
With all that said, I must say you’re going about it the right way. Classic “pump and dump.” I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of lease, let me know.
Hahah! Well put. Guys, if you have one of these leeching on you, and you wanna drop her FAST, *learn* from this case-study :)
Source: This blog post
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Labels: beautiful girl, humor, Humour, rich husband
